I get asked a lot of questions by my clients and students.
When I was reflecting on 2016 I realized that I typically get asked the same questions over and over and I thought it would be fun to share those questions and my answers. During my newborn sessions there is typically a lot of chit chat: I find babies are comforted by the sound of voices but there’s also a lot of time to fill while little ones feed, burp, or when they’re drifting off to sleep.
When parents come into my studio for their newborn session there is a lot of raw emotion, questions, and huge transitions to process. I love hearing my clients birth stories, what their pregnancies were like, how older siblings are adjusting, how parents are feeling, and what those first few days of their little ones life have been like.
I’m a meticulous planner and organizer. When I was pregnant with my eldest son I read everything I could get my hands on and oh boy did I ever have plans. And then as we left the hospital I stopped in the hallway and my husband turned to ask if I’d forgotten something.
“They’re just going to let us take him home” I asked him.
“Um. yes”
“Like that’s it? We just leave the hospital and we’re on our own”
Motherhood hit me like a ten tonne truck. When you are used to being in control of your life (or at least under the illusion that you’re in control) the small little being who comes home with you and is completely foreign and unknown is like an atomic bomb going off in your well ordered world.
“It gets easier right?”
Moms and dads ask me this all the time. About newborns, about their toddlers and children, and even about the magical unicorn age when photo sessions (and just about everything else) gets easier.
It gets, well, different. That’s about the best I can do.
It’s different because you learn who the little person is and what their needs and wants are. Its different because you learn and they learn. Its different because you change your expectations.
We survived babyhood, toddlerhood, and the preschool years. I now have a 4 year old, 8 year old, and 10 year old. The tales of sleeplessness, vomit, and hair pulling irritation and frustration are foggy. I know it was challenging but I’m certainly not breathing a huge sigh of relief that we’re on the magical ‘other side’.
It’s not easier than it was, just remarkably different. Then it was sleeplessness, crying, feeding challenges, and the unknown. Now we navigate peer relationships, family values, technology, and boundaries. I won’t say it gets easier because different isn’t easy. But as your perspective changes and your relationships with your kids develop you realize that there’s no end destination where parenting is easier but just a journey you’re on with some pretty incredible people.
PS: Photos with older kids aren’t easier either. They’re just different. Please see photo evidence of hilarious sass and personality